I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
