im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Hippo gnu deer
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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