god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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