And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
It's never too late to be topless.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
