This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
