Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
