There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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