i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
