Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
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