my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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