That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Randomize
