Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize