I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
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