1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
What a dumb baby whore.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
