Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
