I hope mine doesn't look like that
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
