i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
