no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Randomize
