This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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