Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
