do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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