I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
