...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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