we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
