I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
