That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
