I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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