Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize