I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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