Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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