Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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