I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
COCAINE IS GR8
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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