): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
