he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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