so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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