i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
