Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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