Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
