Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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