You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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