His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
