let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
