Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Randomize
