he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
The adults are the big ones right?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
