what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize