Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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