I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
