Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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