I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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