he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
